This is the Thirty-Fourth Biannual Nudeist Colony and Barbeque
Today I am publishing a "Nudeist Colony." This is the formerly weekly feature that shows off some of the more interesting paths readers took to reach this particular blog. As usual, all referrer logs are of English-speaking Americans using Windows and Internet Explorer, unless otherwise indicated.

Thu Sep 29 22:07:55 2005
pcp0012292423pcs.panamc01.fl.comcast.net
68.59.73.62
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_10_17_lemonparty_archive.html
http://www.comcast.net/qry/websearch?cmd=qry&safe=on&query=nudeism&x=18&y=5


In the last Nudeist Colony, I provided an incorrect definition of nudeist. Though I thought was giving you a definition of nudeist,it was actually the definition of chimera. I apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.

In reality, nudeism is the most popular arcade game of all time. The premise is simple: Two players each receive a set of four pads arranged in a cross in front of video screen. Speakers blast loud dance music, and a series of arrows crawls up the screen. When each arrow reaches it's dock the players must step on the associated pad. The more accurate one's timing the more points one scores. At the end of the song the player with more points is victorious. There are innumerable versions of nudeism, and a number of copycat competitors.

The game is most popular among teenagers of a somewhat unsavory persuasion. That is to say that it is the only exercise and social activity available to many of the various groups of youths dressed primarily in black. Punk, Goth, scene, Otaku, whatever you label yourself, if you're a nudeism player you are, without doubt, a big, sweaty dork.


Sat Oct 1 12:34:32 2005
12-218-55-138.client.mchsi.com
12.218.55.138
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2005/02/twenty-third-annual-nudeist-colony.html
http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=utf-8&fr=slv1-adbe&p=aliens having sex pictures

I make one ill-advised reference to Japanese artwork, and suddenly I'm on all sorts of unsavory lists. Maybe, just maybe, this search was made in jest. Yes, perhaps it was nothing but a satirical jab at the disgusting morass of perversity that is the Internet. Would that I could believe that, would that I could.


Sat Oct 22 18:12:52 2005
user-142g16u.cable.mindspring.com
72.40.4.222
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_10_17_lemonparty_archive.html
http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=nudeism pics&fr=FP-tab-web-t-303&toggle=1&cop=&ei=UTF-8

Hopefully this guy was operating under a misapprehension. Knowing what you now do about nudeism, would you really want to see pictures of it in action? I think not. Yet this particular Mindspring user went through a couple of pages of our archives apparently in search of just that.


Sun Oct 23 23:26:59 2005
66-52-139-249.oak.mcn.org
66.52.139.249
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_08_01_lemonparty_archive.html
http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=furries porn pics&prssweb=Search&ei=UTF-8&fl=0&xargs=0&pstart=1&fr

A moment ago I was discussing how disturbing it is that anyone would have a desire to see pictures of nudeism. You remember, yes? That was nothing. This is a search for erotic images of people in animal suits. People in animal suits. Having sex. Pictures. We don't have any. I tell you that in every single Nudeist Colony, but you keep coming back, hoping for your fursuit erotica. Why? Why? WHY!?


Mon Oct 24 10:51:12 2005
Netscape 5
pool-70-16-48-34.syr.east.verizon.net
70.16.48.34
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/
http://www.altavista.com/image/results?itag=ody&q=furries&kgs=1&kls=0&stq=80

I always have mixed feelings about Nudeist Colonies. When I discuss these topics I get scream at all the creepy folks who find their way here, and, hopefully, mildly entertain my more mainstream readers. However, every time I publish words like "nudeist," "furry," and "porn" I bring ever more sickos to my humble blog. It's a vicious cycle, and it is worrying away at my sanity. Surely there must be some way I can profit from the perverts.


Sat Oct 29 14:00:33 2005
English (United Kingdom)
popl-cache-5.server.ntli.net
62.255.64.8
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/
http://search.msn.co.uk/results.aspx?FORM=MSNH&CP=1252&q=nudeist camps

So now they have camps for nudeists? Are these summer camps for the younger set of sweaty gamers to while away their lazy summer days, or are they perhaps internment camps? They could even be death camps. Phone your senator; someone out there is systematically murdering smelly nerds!

Sat Oct 29 12:42:50 2005
pool-70-106-140-200.chi.dsl-w.verizon.net
70.106.140.200
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/
http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=family nudeist&sm=Yahoo%21 Search&fr=FP-tab-web-t&toggle=1&cop=&ei

Ah, the eternal question: can a nudeist have a family? It really comes down to a question of nature versus nurture. Are they nudeists because they play nudeism, or do they play nudeism because they are nudeists? In the case of the former it is impossible for a nudeist to have a family because that family will immediately disown him or her when they discover what their child does. In the latter case it is indeed possible for a nudeist have a family, but only a latent nudeist, one who has not yet discovered his or her passion for the dance.


Sat Oct 29 19:30:30 2005
ip68-6-235-116.sd.sd.cox.net
68.6.235.116
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2005_02_13_lemonparty_archive.html
http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=utf-8&fr=slv1-&p=pictures of twelve year olds having sex

On the bright side, there is no mention here of nudeism or nudeists. See, there really is a silver lining to every dark cloud. The dark cloud is of course the sad fact that my site is a shining beacon to pederasts. We still don't have pictures of twelve year olds having sex. We don't have pictures of anyone having sex. We keep it clean for the kiddies, not for the kiddie lovers.


Sun Oct 30 12:02:11 2005
pcp0010442536pcs.sabrna01.az.comcast.net
69.139.217.90
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2005_02_13_lemonparty_archive.html
http://www.parseek.com/search/?q=sex 12-17 year old picturs&start=1

Well you've at least got to hand it to the last guy for knowing what he wants. This one can't decide what he really wants. Yeah, he likes the twelve-year-old booty just like his predecessor, but he's willing to go for anything as long as it isn't legal. That's what's truly peculiar. To tell the truth, there really isn't that great a deal of difference in appearance between a seventeen-year-old and an eighteen-year-old. Trust me on this one, I've been both. The only difference is legality. A twelve-year-old however, is markedly different in appearance. This suggests that this fellow doesn't even care what he's looking at as long as he think he's getting away with something. It makes me sick, not so much that he's looking for nudie pics of little children as that he doesn't even care what he sees. Come on man, find something specific to be passionate about. Illegal porn is an awfully big category.


Sun Oct 30 13:53:06 2005
pcp08487311pcs.phnixv01.pa.comcast.net
68.81.154.141
http://www.lemonparty.blogspot.com
http://www.parseek.com/search/?q=sex 12-17 year old picturs

Exact same search, exact same search engine, but this time it's from Phoenix, Pennsylvania rather than Sabrina, Arizona. It's not legal there either.

Actually, if you want to get technical, he's looking for picturs, not pictures, and I'm pretty sure there's no law against having "picturs" of twelve- to seventeen-year-olds having sex. It's also interesting to note this person is apparently located in Arizona, but is using a Persian search engine. One should hope that this throws up all sorts of red flags at the Department of Homeland Security. On the other hand that would probably that this site is being watched as well. That is so my excuse next time I don't feel like updating. Sorry guys, but I was in Guantanamo.


Sun Oct 30 16:58:22 2005
netblock-66-159-228-110.dslextreme.com
66.159.228.110
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_08_22_lemonparty_archive.html
http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=stripteasing videos&ei=UTF-8&fr=FP-tab-img-t-216&fl=0&x=wrt

Isn't it peculiar how a search for stripteasing videos now seems so mundane? After the what we've been through it's only to be expecting. No, we don't have what this fellow's looking for either. What we have here is just couple of guys who have become very, very bitter about the Internet.

But hey, cheer up, Cellars of IMDb #10 foes live on Friday at exactly 12:01 AM Eastern Standard Time. That's just barely over twenty-four hours. Be there, or be without immediate access to the best Cellars yet.



And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 11:43 PM