I am a time-bomb
You know, people have often asked me just what it's like being an e-internet celebrity. Many times I will have people walk up to me on the street and say: "Excuse me fine sir, but are you the illustrious Lemon Party poster turtle_07", and I of course respond with a "Verily kind sir, that man of which you speak is I!" Bad grammar and outdated modes of speaking be damned, I do actually say that. Although usually after I answer that they hit me and call me a fag. Apparently some people have misconceptions about what it means to be an e-internet celebrity... that or they're just plain rude.

Not that I really care about people having misconceptions (although their rudeness is rather tiring), being an e-internet celebrity means that I'm entirely apathetic when it comes to 'the other half'. That's right, in fact I would only acknowledge your existence if you were to come close enough to effect me in such a way that I might somehow spill my chardonnay and have potatoes au gratin stain my satin vest. In any case it should be obvious that you're all incredibly worthless, more so than paperweights.

So worthless in fact that if you were Jesus Christ you would just be the omega... do you see where this is going? You lack worth, plain and simple. But what's the point to all this? Why am I writing this? I'm afraid that this has no point, much like your life. Oh don't get me wrong, it started off having a point but once it turned into an update about talking about how terrible you (not even sure who you is) are it sort of degraded into some sort of monster and I wasn't sure where to go with it.

At which point I thought why not be honest and explain myself? Which is why I wrote that previous sentence. Now the update doesn't even make sense anymore, I'm out.


And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Andrew @ 9:57 PM