On the Brink of Something Special
Now don't get your knickers in a twist over this, but I have it on good authority that we have just recently gotten past the festival of Christ-mas. Fortunately or unfortunately that is false. The festival of Christ-mas is in its last stages, but it is far from over. It wasn't always this way though.

Cue flashback music if you like.

You see in the old days the date of Christ-mas was uncertain, as were most dates. There were a number of factors contributing to this predicament, not the least of which was the difficulty the ancients had in figuring out just how many days there are in year. Eventually that all got straightened out and we had one single solitary day of Christmas.

But a funny thing happened. People realized that Christ-mas was just too much for just one* day.** So they decided to expand it into a "holiday season," which is PC for "Jesus was way cool month." The "holiday season" lasts from the end of Thanksgiving on until New Year's Day, and its hallmarks are inhumanity to fellow shoppers and general crass consumerism. There's also some undertones of thankfulness and giving, but mostly we're talking about the exchange of items of monetary value obtained at the minimum expenditure of monies. Again this is not to say that Christ-mas is entirely heartless as many angsty bloggers would have you believe, but it is a naive self-delusion to ignore certain less than fully spiritual ramifications of the festival.

Why should we care about that Jesus fellow anyway? It's not as if his existence has been conclusively proven, let alone his divinity. So why does everyone kowtow to him twice a year? Because everyone else is doing it. That's really all it comes down to folks, there's no rocket science here, just mob mentality. Perhaps you might even want to refer to it as "peer pressure," though that seems somewhat inexact to this writer. Regardless, the Jesus bloke is here to stay, so you might as well join the pack, you angsty whiners. Sure the religion is of questionable merit, and the festival's connection to the religion is even more questionable, but it's better for the rest of us if the stupid people don't complain. Just grit your teeth and bear it. There are worse things than unhappy morons after all.

And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.

* Two.

** Days.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 2:09 AM