Nudeist Colony Twelve: The Twelfth Nudeist Colony
Yes it's another week of fine vintage referrer logs. Since I've got your attention for a brief moment now, a brief moment betwixt your loading up the Lemon Party site and your delving into the referrer logs, allow me to pose a question to you. Do you want the Nudeist Colony to remain an irregular weekly event? I can consistently post these on a single day, or I could bump back the regularity. This could be a biweekly (as in once every two weeks), monthly or even quarterly event. Leave any thoughts you might have as comments (obviously) or email me your concerns at Odovaucer(at)gmail(dot)com. With that out of the way, let's check out some referrer logs. As usual, language, OS, and ISP are left out unless particularly insightful.

Sat Nov 20 21:06:54 2004
h000d88201973.ne.client2.attbi.com
24.147.207.38
http://216.239.57.104/search?q=cache:b0H1MTpX8QQJ:lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_08_22_lemonparty_archive.html scrumtulescent&hl=en
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=scrumtulescent&spell=1

I'd like to apologize for this one. This is entirely my fault. Of course it is rather amusing that I'm making fun of a person who found us through my making fun of someone else for the word scrumtulescent. That first hit was from my critique of D&D that unfortunately used that very pseudo-word. Yes, that's right, "scrumtulescent" is still just as much of a word as "nudeist." I would compare it to "irregardless," but that abomination has been used so many frequently that dictionaries are forced to include, though they strongly discourage its use. That doesn't mean there's any excuse to use this "nonstandard" "word." Similarly you should make sure not to pronounce either and neither as "eye-ther" and "nie-ther." Nonstandard is not your friend.

Mon Nov 22 15:17:27 2004
217.219.118.132
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004/11/nine-and-nine-makes-eighteen-but-this.html
http://www.google.com/search?hl=fa&q=nudeism&btnG=%D8%AC%D8%B3%D8%AA %D9%88%D8%AC%D9%88%DB%8C %DA%A

This guy really tried, several times, to find some sort of nudeism on these pages. He failed, but that doesn't mean others won't follow in his footsteps. In fact it is inevitable that he is not the last of his breed. Interesting this one is also entirely my fault. When I began to notice that Carver Buns title, "Nudeist Poster" was attracting a noticeable number of search engine hits I decided to augment the process by keywording that "word" and the related not-word "nudeism." Sure enough we got hits from those, and I felt like I had made myself stupider by essentially inviting these people to Lemon Party. Well, perhaps they'll learn something while they're looking for pictures.

Tue Nov 23 01:59:50 2004
cs70112104-77.austin.rr.com
70.112.104.77
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004/11/nine-and-nine-makes-eighteen-but-this.html
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&q=lemonp

Why makes a person curious about "lemonp?" That's a question I never imagined before today. It doesn't posible that the "p" was a typo as it is nowhere near the "n" on a standard keyboard. So we can safely rule out accident, but what possible purpose does searching for "lemonp" serve? I had a look at the results and I was unable to find anything that seemed particularly likely to be the object of a search. Google did, however, suggest that I try "lemon" instead. I suppose we're just dealing with a giant moron. I'm used to it by now.

Tue Nov 23 02:21:16 2004
pool-70-21-158-180.nwrk.east.verizon.net
70.21.158.180
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_08_29_lemonparty_archive.html http://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=slv1-fp&p=nudeist living

Well isn't that something? This guy doesn't just want pictures of a non-existent lifestyle. No he wants to actually understand the lifestyle of the "nudeist." It's a beautiful thing seeing an East Newark resident caring about the living habits of others. Pity he's so fucking stupid.

Wed Nov 24 22:15:48 2004
pool-70-19-215-55.bos.east.verizon.net
70.19.215.55
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/
Bookmark or Typed

Isn't that sweet? Octopud is still alive and reading!

Wed Nov 24 21:14:38 2004
ds04isa.BestBuy.com
198.22.123.14
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004/11/nine-and-nine-makes-eighteen-but-this.html
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&q=lemonparty

If you're searching for "LemonParty" from a Best Buy something is seriously wrong with you. Best Buy is not for surfing for images of octogenarian antics, especially not those particular antics. It is an inappropriate place from which to read this blog. Sorry fella, but we want your patronage on your own time. If you're at best Buy, you'd best be buying. ZING!

Thu Nov 25 06:16:15 2004
cache-ntc-ac07.proxy.aol.com
198.81.26.76
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2004_02_08_lemonparty_archive.html
http://aolsearch.aol.com/aol/search?query=u r an asshole&page=2&Stage=0&invocationType=keyword_roll

You have my affidavit that this is entirely real. I did not make this one up folks; you're really seeing an AOL user searching for the phrase "u r an asshole." There is no commentary that can upstage the sheer wonder of that search. This is one for the scrapbooks folks. Link to this one in your LJ and spread the wonder of AOL users.

Sat Nov 27 00:23:07 2004
AC8AD923.ipt.aol.com
172.138.217.35
http://lemonparty.blogspot.com/2003_12_28_lemonparty_archive.html
http://search.msn.com/results.aspx?srch=105&FORM=AS5&q=nude pic of 15 year old girl

WHy do you want to see a nude pic of a 15 year old girl? Don't you know you can find legal images of women who look fifteen? Don't you know that fifteen year-olds are generally less attractive than young ladies who have had a little more time to fill out? Maybe you just don't know that what you're looking for is illegal. Regardless of your motivation, you make me sick. And you readers taking your vicarious thrills from this shit, I hate you too.


And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 8:28 AM