Enter Gimmick
Have you ever wondered just what does love got do with it? Or perhaps the question on their mind is more along the lines of "do you love me?" And why don't you get a job? Does anyone know where you are going? These are important questions. These are not questions to be ignored. Yet today's update will not strive to answer them. The answers may appear at some point, but if so it's completely accidental.

Today we're going to talk about gimmickry in commenting. Now oddly enough we're not going to begin with commenting itself, but an earlier subject. (Begin pop culture aside to enhance google hits: It's kind of like that Friends episode where Phoebe agrees to teach Joey to play the guitar but doesn't let him touch a guitar. Or learn the names of the chords. End cheesy/sleazy aside.) What we're starting with is mindset. When I broke down the definition of gimmick I touched on four possible intentions:

a) Simple amusement of the reader
b) Simple amusement of the poster
c) Creation of delicious, delicious irony visible to the reader
d) Creation of delicious, delicious irony visible to the poster

Do not assume these are one in the same. For our purposes simple amusement and delicious, delicious irony are an either or proposition. No gimmick can be both simultaneously. The real problem for amateurish gimmick posters is the distinction between the poster and the reader. The poster is you. If you find it funny then the poster finds it funny (by definition). This does NOT mean anyone else finds it funny. It's most likely impossible to amuse every reader, but it's very easy to amuse none of them.

Humor is an exercise in empathy. The first step to amusing someone is finding out what amuses them. It sounds obvious, but you'd be surprised how unfunny so many people are. And of course most of the people making jokes on the internet are incapable of being funny. Because most of the people on the internet are fucking morons. Blogs should be one of the best examples, up there with Hentai fans, "punk rockers," "gangstas," Republicans, and Wiccans. Yes there are Wiccans on the internet. I would have guessed they were too busy rolling in mud to install Linux, but it seems I was wrong. Pity.

Of course you don't have to amuse your audience; there's technically no reason not to make as many Homestar Runner, Badger Badger Badger, Cthulhu, Akbar, Anime, etc. references as you want. No one can stop you; it's a free internet. But don't expect any to say anything nice about you. Actually I take that back. You probably will get tons of positive feedback, because it seems the more pathetically imbecilic and incorrect you are the more supportive imbeciles find you. But about when you turn thirteen (mentally) you'll regret your antics.

So until next time let's think about our audience. Because to amuse is to understand. And if you're going to delve into the more manipulative side of gimmickry you'll need this basic empathy to get past what minimal intellectual defenses your victims may mount.




And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 10:17 PM