Lemon Party
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Hello World
Another update by Andrew, woooo are you getting tired of my inane ramblings yet? Sigh, sometimes I just get so depressed... just... so depressed that I need to tell the internet about it. I go home sometimes, and I cry. And I think to myself: "If only internet denizens knew of my pain, then I'd get the respect I deserve." But I don't, I don't... for you. If I spend all of my time talking about how horrible my life is, how will our loyal readers learn how to blog? I gladly suffer the burden of the world on my shoulders so that you all can get your daily (not always daily) dosage (do not take more than 50ccs) of Lemon Party's unique brand of humor (humour). Or something like that, my updates have gotten crazier and much less coherent, I've lost the spark of life some might say.
I lack coherency; I lack a preset topic. Which in the end tends to hurt my update. This update will not be long, it will just stand as testament to what I am about to do. If you would like comment and tell me what you want my next update to be on. If not, I will type a random word into google, take a random word from the first webpage, find a synonym and then write the update about that. Things are about to get weird people, can you smell what the rock is cooking?
I'm just kidding, this update won't be short at all. I still have things to talk about, things like my undeniable hatred for wombats. I think that they were wombats anyway, it seems that recently my hatred for random things just tends to merge together. That's the price I pay for hating everyone and everything. Except for all racial and ethnic minorities, please don't sue me. In case you're curious about why I hate everyone so much there is a very good reason for it. So good in fact that I'm going to continue writing sentences about it so that you're driven insane by what the reason might be. Maybe it's castor oil you think, possibly fish paste. What is that damnable reason that Andrew, the master of suspense is keeping from us?
Well, you're all wrong. It's love. I hate because I love. I love you so much that I am forced to see your faults, and through seeing those faults I make commandments, for you people to learn off of. I don't like what I do, but I do it for you. And by saying that I don't like what I do, I actually mean that I do like what I do. It's funny how language works out that way huh? I mean you'd think that by reading that sentence it would mean that I don't enjoy what I do, but because of the subtle intricacies of the English language it actually means the exact opposite, man life is just crazy. I bet that the Chinese don't have that problem. In case you're curious about what sort of problems that Chinese have you should probably head over to a Chinese teenager's blog and learn Chinese. Chinese.
Case in point: I just don't like people.
You know what else I don't like? People who can't take the time to spell one sentence right. No, I'm not talking about random sentences inside updates, I'm talking about people who have as the title to their blog: "Da best blog in da wurld" except that you're pretty sure that they didn't do any of that on purpose to be cute.
Case in point: Klic hear to see what I'm talking bout Willis.
And so, we bid a sorrowful farewell to another fantastic entry were we all learned a lot.
Case in Point:
Thou Shalt Take the Time To Spell Important Sentances (Spelled incorrectly for posterity and irony) Correctly
Case in point: And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
(This has been one turtle_07 catchphrase attempt that will not catch on. You have my word - Odovauver)