Viva Las Lemons
This update has two parts, I shall begin with the first and more important of the two:

Lemon Party is a site. A very important site. It is a site, where three old men pleasure each other. Their courage and strength are beacons of hope to all of us, which is why Lemon Party (The blog) was created. We wanted to give them not only proper representation but also share the beacon of joy and warmth with the world, and the best way to do that was of course to create this blog and begin making fun of other blogs. The mechanics of that statement are quantum mechanics and as such I don't expect you to understand them, needless to say however we have entered stormy waters.

The commandments that we have been doing have been wonderful, and I have enjoyed writing most of them, but they cannot last forever. The last few commandments have been random, they have been oddities that I have been able to find and point out during my blog searches. They cannot last forever, and already I fear that I will not be able to come up with any more. Odovaucer, who also posts on this blog doesn't post often enough to really care, he'll find a commandment to post about because he just has the time to look for anything and everything. I of course am not quite so lucky, I provide most of the filler, hilarious filler, but filler none the less. Since my whole 'telling you how to create entries' never really caught on, that and they were stupid, I have decided to ask you, the readers for advice. What sort of blog related posts can I make without coming up with a new commandment every few days? I understand that many of you would never be caught dead commenting on this blog as the godless cretins... I mean your friends would probably shun you and hate you, but please, for the good of the party I beg of you, give me ideas. If the ideas are not too retarded I'll probably try them all out and see what I like best. If I get no ideas at all I'm going to go home and cry myself to sleep. Which will be rather hard seeing as I am already at home, but that's besides the point.

Phew, it is a good thing, a very good thing indeed to get that off my chest. Loyal readers of Lemon Party, do your stuff!


That said, and said I did say. Let's move onto the real update, the commandment part of the update, because you filthy worms need as much direction in your life as possible otherwise you'd probably fill it with drugs and beastiality. Anyway this update deals with death, death and happiness. I'm not exactly sure why, but it does.

As I was saying before I got off topic, which wasn't actually off topic, just stupid. Anyway, as I was going to say: eyes are wonderful. In my last update I insulted everyone with an eye color other than blue, in this update I plan to bring everyone back together. Whether you have brown eyes, or blue eyes, green eyes, or satanic red ones we call all agree on one thing: dark text on a dark background is hard to read, as is light text on a light background. I mean it's not like an intelligence thing, or some other stupid ugly stupid head thing. It's a god damned "I CAN'T FUCKING SEE ANYTHING" thing. Now by the time you click on the links they might have been changed. Unlike someone's writing skills, which will change slowly (or not at all), sometimes they actually gain some common sense and change their background. One such link that I had planned changed suddenly into something more readable.

Luckily for you, I have still managed to find blogs with a retarded text/background color combination.

This blog is slightly readable, I mean it's not horrible. However it still takes me a moment to figure out what the hell he's saying.

Red text on black = good. Red text on red car background = bad!

This one isn't so hard to read, as it is fucking ugly. There's a white background of a girl and some lines. Real good background you got there champ, I especially like how it scrolls with me and partially obstructs my vision but not enough to be really noticeable, just enough to piss me the fuck off.

So remember kids, when you can't cope Jesus offers

Thou shalt make thine blog readable



And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Andrew @ 9:03 PM