Commandment of the Moment
Guess who's back! Yes Shady's back; tell a friend. But now that the obligatory introduction is behind us we can move onto the matter at hand. Wah, nobody loves me, and my daddy yells at me, and I'm stupid, and I'm failing math, and nobody understands me. And I'm ugly.

Wait a minute, those aren't my lines. No, but it is my subject matter. That's right: Talkin' bout Shaft.* Can ya dig it?

At this point you should have become familiar with the idea of footnotes,** as I've used a couple. They'll most likely continue until I'm sick of them. Which could be a while. Or maybe not. I'm pretty easily distracted. Which reminds of my subject matter. How lucky! D to the infi G! Ok, not gonna get distracted. Blog angst. We've already told you blog angst is a bad thing. Perhaps you forgot the very first commandment: Thou shalt not fish for compliments. Because that's what's going on. This stuff is bullshit. Utter bullshit, and you know it. But you keep piling the crap on because you like having people jumping in to defend you from yourself. It makes you feel loved, it makes you feel important. But it hurts you more than it could possibly help.
Those friends willing to tell you all that bullshit are growing to hate you. This constant pointless demand on them drains them. Soon they'll run out of brown-nosing little platitudes. They'll do their best to fade out of your life. Your more intelligent friends will call you on your shit, and this is where we can to the important bit. These are the people you need to listen to, these friends are smarter and/or more ruthless friends, and they're doing you a far better service. So don't scream and wail. Listen.
For thou shalt accept the criticisms of thy readers for they are smarter than thee.***



And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.



*Actually I'm talking about the littleknown phenomenon**** known as "blog angst." Well I call it blog angst. And I think it's a pretty good name, so I'll stick with it until someone comes up with a better phrase. Maybe something in Latin.

**actually, im talking about how hot kira is...daaaamn.*****

***Normally that would be a link, but I don't feel like linking to the obvious blog because nearly every commandment is a link to that blog.

****Okay, okay, little known does not accurately describe blog angst. The vast majority of blogs contain this useless drivel.

*****That was not the footnote I intended to place there. Unfortunately that space has been co-opted by a higher power. The footnote intended for that space has been temporarily forgotten and will be added at a later date.******

******Ok, got it. This method of footnoting comes to me from an editor I respect quite a bit, though goes by the name "The Ferret." Actually I don't really give a rat's ass about The Ferret; I just like footnotes.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 12:09 AM