Commentary on Commentary
This the time when poor writers would trot out some amusing anecdote or cliche to draw you in. This is also the time when skilled writers would do that. So then of course I must do nothing of the sort as I am a renegade, a rebel, not to mention the best writer this side of Geordie Tait. Or perhaps not. I just really like Tait...If this was Something Awful you'd see a parenthetical statement as to my confirmed heterosexuality. However, as I am the aforementioned renegade/rebel, and because this is not actually Something Awful, you won't be seeing that little disclaimer at the end of this extraordinarily awkward and poorly constructed sentence. (Not Gay) That is exactly what you won't be seeing.

Okay, okay, I admit that was a horrible joke. But I like to nestle an obvious hypocrisy inside the slightly more subtle one, just so everyone can think they understand what I'm driving at. So anyway that's the segue; here's the verse:

Uh wut uh
Where my bitchaz at
Where my hos at?
Uh
Wut

Okay, really I'm finished with the sucky parts of this piece. And if you believe that...Well you probably believe the president was fairly elected and Osama bin Laden is Saddam's gay lover. But now that I've tossed all this useless crap in my segue has gotten lost. The point was that I'm going to be talking about hypocrisy today.

Hypocrisy": For you those of you eat your boogers that blue underlined word was a hyperlink. Click it. Actually swallow first. Then find mummy's detergent. And drink it.

Now, as I was saying, hypocrisy. It's bad, so don't do it. You post your true feelings (or your bullshit feelings, whatever) on your blog. It probably wasn't very well done, but TOO LATE! No way to backtrack now, you're stuck with your opinions. Which means when people call you on your BS you own up to it. Let's say you posted a long boring rant that included a passage about how you didn't really love Dwayne, and then someone asks you why you gave him a handjob in the locker room. This is not the time to reply "I loved him, but I wasn't in love with him. ::sighs::" Not only is that awful for a variety of reasons that will be addressed later or have already been addressed, but you just contradicted yourself. Way to go, you're the next John Stuart Mills! That was sarcasm by the way. You're not the next John Stuart Mills. You're the next Jessica Simpson. Except without the fame, the money, or the surgery. Just the smarts. So remember kids, other people can contradict you just fine, no need to do it yourself you fucking hypocrite.



And remember the guiding light, lest we forget the glory that be Lemon Party.
Because your blog sucks.
- posted by Odovaucer @ 10:52 PM